Celebrity Baby Names

The most recent wacky celebrity baby name is North West. The new baby of Kanye West and one of the Kardashians. Poor kid. On the bright side, I give him a decent chance of dominating school geography contests.

I remember a few other good baby names from the past that rank right up there with North. Anyone else remember Apple, Gwyneth Paltrow’s daughter? Maybe she was trying to get back at her parents for naming her Gwyneth?

How about Beyonce’s kid, Blue Ivy? Not sure if that’s a first and middle name or all one name. Honestly I’m not even sure if it’s a boy or a girl name. Sounds more like a type of vodka to me.

Bruce Willis and Demi Moore (remember her?) named one of their kids, Rumer. Maybe they thought changing the spelling would take away from the terribleness of naming a kid Rumor.

Tom Cruise and his daughter, I mean much younger wife, Katie Holmes had a child named Suri. Fun Fact about Suri: She now spends her days answering questions for people after they push that little button on their iPhones.

George Foreman named all five of his sons George. Seriously.

The grand champion of them all has to be musician Frank and wife Gail Zappa’s baby naming choices. Dweezil, Moon Unit, and my favorite, Diva Muffin. They might as well have installed a stripper pole in Diva Muffin’s crib. Seems like that’s what they wanted her destiny to be.

Hopefully, these kids have had, and will continue to have, wonderful celebrity lives, if not maybe they should go to a kiosk at the local mall and try to find a keychain or coffee cup with their name printed on it. Good luck with that.

-Pete (Diva Muffin) Gilbert

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